Sometimes, you just need to start over

Life will inevitability lead to roadblocks, forks of decision, and sometimes, pitfalls…

As we cruise along the road of life, we often find ourselves in phases of serenity, cruising along the smooth road without a care in the world; in this state, we find ourselves to be content and dare I say, happy. It is in this blissful, safe state that we find it the easiest to just be. Other times, we find there is no way to escape the fog. The dark shadows of night seem to follow our every move, swallowing up any light or joy that attempts to emerge in rebellion as we seek to find our way out, back onto the well-light road of serenity.
Despite which side of the road you are on, or whether you are nestled squarely on the center line, tethering, there comes a point when the inevitable occurs, pushing us towards a point of decision we are not ready to handle. These trying times, tests of will and faith may seem hard or impossible, even more defeating than being lost in the fog, but in reality, they are challenges designed to bring out the best in you.

Understandably, you may feel calling some of the woes, worries, and heartbreaks of life challenging is minimizing the pain felt by those impacted, but that is not the intent. Hard times come, and challenges arise and there is no doubt that some challenges are devastating, even fatal… a fatal prognosis, the loss of a loved one, even losing one’s self. None of these situations should be wanted experiences, but they happen. It is not what happens that defines us though; it’s how we preserve.

Today, I heard the story of a man diagnosed with a brain tumor. The person spoke of how he remember, all these years later, how with the finite amount of time this individual had left, they dedicated their time to investing in others, particularly children. When I personally observed a gentleman with brain cancer, he too had demonstrated a sense of ease with his situation, which naturally brought calmness and serenity to those he influenced. These men turned their biggest life challenge, and fuel a passion to make things better for others. It is not just with health situations that this occurs though. I’ve seen women who were abused, battered, or broken seek out opportunities or even create ministries to help other people navigate the pain they experienced; they made their life test a testimony. But, the reality is, this is not an instantaneous process; it takes time and the amount of time needed for you to rise up and out of your challenge cannot be determined by others. We often let others define our healing process, put a timeline healing process, or assign an agenda to help us “process” the experience based on their needs, perspective, or reality. But, this is not only unrealistic; it is not feasible. We all need different things to heal. Holistic health embraces wellness wholly, choosing what is optimal for your well-being based on scientific evidence merged with your intuition. You may need a year of counseling, and that is alright. Even if you need five, there is no timeline. You may be able to thrive with only changes for which you have some semblance of control or maybe you need medical intervention. No journey is perfectly defined nor will we all be alright with a one-size-fits-all approach. The beauty that lies in overcoming your challenge is that you can actively decide and be a part of the process. From the most fatal situations to the most unexpected changes in circumstances, you can grow, learn, and even positively influence others based on how you navigate your life challenges. The most important thing to remember though, is you have to be open, willing, and vulnerable enough to take the first step in starting over after the challenge. Leaving yourself in a state of mental, emotional, spiritual, or even financial defeat will not serve you well. Though it is an option, it is not the best. Staying in a paralyzing state of fear forever will also not serve you well, nor will it allow you to turn your mess into a message or your test into a testimony. While there is no rush in moving forward and navigating out of the fog, remember this, every moment you delay is a heart untouched by your light, love, wisdom, and influence. Every time you choose to delay stepping out into the unknown, you push your blessings down the road. Freedom is necessary to start over, no matter how much of our finite time is left on this beautiful Earth. Freedom from fear of release. Navigate the pain, seek the support you deserve, and take the time you need, but remember to let the process be a process of healing and release, rather than a self-imposed prison of defeat.

Wishing you well..one moment, one breath, one step at a time, allow yourself to start over, at your own pace, in your own time. Be Remade as your past or present challenges do not define you; they were made to empower you.

Image by Joshua_j_Woroniecki on Unsplash